Filtered from 'Akihara, Ryuuji'

[thefifthmonarch]

Mmm. Feel depressed, despite arguing with that guy.

Can people stop something as great truth, if hope is strong enough?

Mmm. Feel a little lonely.

... and he had to attack me about that...

Probably gonna be miserable.

Comments

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

It's happened more than once, so I'd have to say 'yes'.

Attacked you about what?

[thefifthmonarch.livejournal.com]

Why I'm bothering defending and arguing for solving problems concerning others when I can't solve my own.

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

Ah ha... Well, in your defense, sometimes figuring it out for others can help you figure out your own problems.

[thefifthmonarch.livejournal.com]

Pfft, like I can solve my problems. I just need to muster up the courage to have the Witch remove this hex on my mind.

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

Heh. I still think it's not as hopeless as you think, but we've already been over that, haven't we?

Why not keep riding it out? What do you have to lose?

[thefifthmonarch.livejournal.com]

Everything. Suicide.

Just... a lot of things.

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

...Suicide isn't an option. If you're going to be so bad that you can't find a use for your life, then give it to me and I'll find one for you.

What sort of things?

[thefifthmonarch.livejournal.com]

What sort of a use could you have for me? I'd still know this is a fraud.

... I just... can't be a Pauper and a Princess at the same time.

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

I could always find one. Better that then wasting your life.

You could just be a nice princess, who doesn't talk down to people, or you could switch between as needed. Both would work, at least to an extent. Although the first would work better, in my opinion.

[thefifthmonarch.livejournal.com]

Like what?

I'm not going to become two people. I can't merge, I have to be as Shikou put it, a spoiled brat.

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

I don't know off the top of my head. ;P Maybe a maid. *shrugs*

Because you don't want to take a chance so you can have your cake and eat it too. Because you're so scared of failure that you won't even think about how things might not be so bad even if you do.

[thefifthmonarch.livejournal.com]

I am not hired help.

Because if I fail, I have nothing.

Honestly, I wish I could just go back to being myself... people treating me as I deserve to be treated. Obviously, it was a lie to want friendship.

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

It's better than being dead.

If you fail, you only have more reason to change, so you can have something else instead. It's not the end of the world.

[thefifthmonarch.livejournal.com]

... maybe to you.

Not when I'm on the street without money.

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

It's not like you'd be working in a factory, or being a janitor for a school.

Friends would give you someplace to stay.

[thefifthmonarch.livejournal.com]

It's close enough.

Pffft.

What friends? You? Shikou? Pfft. I don't even have proper friends. I'm still a lonely bitch noone wants to touch.

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

You'd just have to be willing to learn your new role, is all. How can you say it's bad if you've never even tried it?

Sure, I would. I wouldn't wait on you at all, but I'd give you a place to sleep if you asked for it. Help you get something to eat, and that sort of thing.

[thefifthmonarch.livejournal.com]

Because. RICH PEOPLE AREN'T MAIDS.

... And I don't want to live with you, Eusebius.

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

They can be, if they're into that sort of thing.

It's still an option, if you needed it.

[thefifthmonarch.livejournal.com]

Pfft. Not me. Or what, you're going to make me want to wear frilly skirts and dust things off?

It's. Not. An. Option.

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

Only if you asked me to, or did something that would warrant something like that as punishment.

And why wouldn't it be?

[thefifthmonarch.livejournal.com]

So either I do it or you'll 'Punish' me. Real nice, dahling. Quite. We really do appreciate your belief in Free Will, monsuier. Really. We're touched. ::Claps::

Because. I. Can't. Do. That. Dahling.

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

...nooo.... I'm just saying there are conditions that would have to be met before I'd really consider it. Again, like you asking, or doing something like threatening someone I care for... that sort of thing.

It's not your 'ideal' situation, no, but it is there if you needed a net, so to speak.

[thefifthmonarch.livejournal.com]

I'd never want to be a maid, you idiotic prat

And what the hell do I have in common with that silly bimbo you have with the glasses that I'd attack her for, you common trash?

Net? NET? I have NO net regardless, commoner.

[pureplainpatron.livejournal.com]

...sounds like you've forgotten yourself again... not that it wasn't obvious that you were falling.

You also forget just how easily I can make a fortune... it wouldn't take much to take one away. Money is a very transitory thing, "Princess". You can proclaim your 'lineage' as much as you like, but it doesn't change the fact that Vidya can easily recover from a fall you can't seem to, and could make money hand over fist if she wanted to.